I met the Guido (drum roll please) at a restaurant. Not at a bar or online… and it still didn’t work out! What the heck!I went to an upscale seafood place in north Scottsdale with some friends. Seafood is not my cup of tea, especially upscale seafood, AKA expensive seafood. But I have to say it was a cute restaurant with an even cuter server, even if he did turn out to be The Guido. So I ordered the chicken and shut my mouth… about the location.
I may have accidentally flirted with this cute server. Maybe. My friend kept egging me on. He said he would pay for my meal if I wrote my phone number on the check. I chickened out. I had already blushed eight times from just making eye contact with the Guido. So I paid for my own meal.When Guido was about to take my check, he said “did you write your number in there?”. In front of everyone. I was speechless! My friends jaw dropped, there was a second of silence, and I was blushing. The Guido is not lacking in the “balls” department. And I realized that I really just lost out on a free meal!
So, I gave him my number.Now, when I met him, I was sitting down. I apparently wasn’t aware that I was as tall as him, in fact taller, because I pretty much wear 4 inch heels at all times, especially on dates. Lets be honest, heels make you look thinner, and I will take any help I can get to look thinner, even if it means that I am almost six feet tall. The good news was that I could rationalize buying a new pair of shoes. Truth be told, I really have a talent for rationalizing shoe purchases. I have cute little feet! So, I bought a pair of flat boots, the ones that go over my jeans. These are now known as the Guido boots!
He called me, and asked me out. We went to a trendy restaurant in old town. When I walked in, I realized that not only was I as tall as him, but actually a bit taller, even with my flat Guido boots. Now, don’t get me wrong, I have no problem with short men…I just happen to be a thick girl, so the chances of you being short and thicker than me as a man are slim…unless you are just really fat. I bring enough meat to the table…but I also don’t want to crush anyone.After our awkward hug, we sat down to eat. He was actually pretty funny. We had a good time! Even through all the “yada, yada, yada”s.
He is your typical Italian American guy that’s into cars and pasta. Hence, the Guido.(again, I apologize if I offend anyone). Although if you are an Italian guy…or any guy for that matter, I would like to thank you for reading this?The date ended well. He asked me out again. I accepted.
Next date, same Guido boots, a car show, and a really horrible kiss later… I lost a little interest. I know the first kiss is almost always a bit awkward, but eventually you can get into the swing of things. Not with the Guido. It was awkward and just bad.Because I had a decent time with him, and because I was pretty desperate, I would have gone out with him again. Make him practice kissing his arm for a bit. But he got progressively more needy by the day. He would text, and if I didn’t respond immediately, he would ask if I lost interest.
So eventually, I did.